Tuesday, January 15, 2008

In great need of encouragement

Well, I'm in a lull today -- actually the past couple of days. This big 'ole house is lonely. Hubby has been gone almost a week. I'm stuck in the routine/schedule of two little girls and I can't get out. Internet access is almost impossible. My cell phone is dead and I'm without a charger. I feel like I'm losing my connection to the outside world. It's 26 degrees (f) here today. And too windy to get the girls out. Maddy is breaking out -- I'm sure from something she has eaten -- what? is the mystery. Having food allergies to peanuts, eggs and milk, it's impossible to shield her from all of those. So, which one is the culprit this time? Who knows?

I'm feel unorganized. I need to get online and pay bills, but it takes so long for the pages to load. And then, when they do, the payment never processes. I feel so scattered. I don't have all I need here -- my files, my systems. Anyone who knows me knows that I work best in a routine. I work best in my own environment. Change really stresses me out. And I'm someone who needs support and lots of encouragement. And unfortunately, two little girls aren't able to give me support OR encouragement.

I also feel like I'm running in circles . . . changing diapers, vacuuming, mopping the kitchen floor, fixing a meal and then cleaning up a meal . . . it's never ending. I'm wondering when I'm going to get to stand back, look at my accomplishments and feel good --- feel like something has been done. Most days I feel like I'm just chasing my tail. Seriously! And I know I'm not alone. I've read the other blogs from other mothers -- And I'm a smart girl -- I know I shouldn't be looking to you all for encouragement. Instead, I should be opening God's word because I know he has a lot to say to me.

So I'm asking you for prayer. I know the lull will be short lived and I know this is just an adjustment. But please, please pray that God will help me "get it together."

Oh, and I promise I'll be back with a post. I've started one and I just need to get it posted. Because of my internet connection, I have to type it in Word and then take about 10 to 15 minutes to get online and attempt to post. So, wish me luck -- hopefully it will be posted today!

Oh and if you feel led to, please feel free to leave me a comment. I may not be able to respond, but I'd love to hear from you.


Megan (FriedOkra) said...

These cold winter months are hard on ALL mothers of little children, and I know from experience that the first long cold winter is exceptionally tough on a Mama used to warmer weather and the option of getting out pretty much whenever she wants to. You WILL adjust and do fine. Is there a way to meet other moms with young kids in your area and perhaps set up a playdate? Do you have ANY contacts via a church, etc. who could point you to some community resources? Also, is there a public library or a nursery/greenhouse nearby? We love going to those place this time of year. Free and warm and full of things kids enjoy.

I will pray for a quick adjustment for you AND for some company - you need people around you - you can't be alone all the time.

At A Hen's Pace said...

Oh, Summer, hang in there! It must be so difficult to function without the conveniences and the rhythms that you're used to--I can't imagine. (Well, I SORTA can imagine because almost every other day, I wish I had something I packed up last April. Not the same, but still, frustrating!)

I am praying for you. When does hubby get back? Is it time to plan a trip to IL?? We'd LOVE that--but would understand if that's overwhelming right now. Of course, you can pay your bills while you're here--we have a high-speed connection!


Keeping you and those cuties in my prayers--


Anna K. said...

I'm new to your blog, so I hope you don't mind if I leave a comment for you. My hubby is a Marine and is often gone for weeks or months at a time. I had to learn the hard way that it's okay to get frustrated and out-of-sorts every now and then!
It sounds like you've just had a big change...go easy on yourself, Shug.